I miss saying your name
Apr. 29th, 2026 03:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sabriel007Hey You,
I was walking around the lake today - not our lake, a smaller one I think you've never been to. It seems fitting that it's smaller, since life has felt smaller since we moved apart. More condensed in some way. Maybe it's living in a town by a mountain instead of a bay, in a valley you can't see past the edges of. Everything feels more solid, more contained. Anyway, I was walking around the lake, and there was a man jumping between the rocks instead of walking on the path. I know that's more like me than you, but suddenly I wanted more than anything to run into you, walking around the lake. The man seemed older, but then, we're older now. Would you be like that, with grey hair, a slight stoop... Would I recognize you? Would you have a kid with you, or a few? Maybe they'd be balancing on the rocks, trying to count the turtles.
I know you're half a country away, that we can't speak anymore without insulting each other, that you're almost certainly not going to be at any lake I am at,
But I miss you. I really want to see you, and the way that my seeing you makes you smile. That's all.
"I had a dream that you could be on my team and everything would be so much better, but it was just a dream."
I was walking around the lake today - not our lake, a smaller one I think you've never been to. It seems fitting that it's smaller, since life has felt smaller since we moved apart. More condensed in some way. Maybe it's living in a town by a mountain instead of a bay, in a valley you can't see past the edges of. Everything feels more solid, more contained. Anyway, I was walking around the lake, and there was a man jumping between the rocks instead of walking on the path. I know that's more like me than you, but suddenly I wanted more than anything to run into you, walking around the lake. The man seemed older, but then, we're older now. Would you be like that, with grey hair, a slight stoop... Would I recognize you? Would you have a kid with you, or a few? Maybe they'd be balancing on the rocks, trying to count the turtles.
I know you're half a country away, that we can't speak anymore without insulting each other, that you're almost certainly not going to be at any lake I am at,
But I miss you. I really want to see you, and the way that my seeing you makes you smile. That's all.
"I had a dream that you could be on my team and everything would be so much better, but it was just a dream."
